The skinny of the skinny

I have put some thought into this.  Since I see it affecting me in a twisted way.  Anyways, I work with a very slim, petite 30 something who probably wears a size XS.  Not that there is anything wrong with that.  Because, I would be thrilled and tickled pink, if it were me.   But, when she tells a former fatty that she is huge.  I just want to toss my Medifast cookies!  She quickly amended her remarks to.  “Well I can’t say that with you.  You lose a human” Yeah don’t tell a person who was a size 20 that you’re fat. Lol. 

However I can’t fault her for it.  We all have some mental block about our weight.  Real or perceived we all have something we don’t like.  And even though we have lost weight we still think we are fat.  And from years of being fat we just can’t help that thought.  I am slowly learning to get past it.  However I still look in the mirror and see me at size 20 sometimes.  I KNOW I am smaller.  I SEE the smaller clothes I am wearing and I UNDERSTAND the destructive cycle this could lead to.   But that doesn’t stop me from thinking I am still the fatty from 11 months ago. 

I am losing weight again but when I measure my inches I am still where I was in March.  This may be what is making me still think I am fat.  Not sure.  But again I am working on it.  I def have a self-image problem with my behind.    I have been told lately that I should buy and wear leggings.  But fear of my large hind quarters has so far stopped me.  I can’t help but think my back side is as I like to put it “ghetto booty big” because I am still wearing 12-14 pants with an M top.  Just a bit off and not at all even.

I guess I feel a bit better after hearing the skinny girl swear up and down she is fat.  If fat was 110 pounds then I’m thinking we would all wish we were fat rather than skinny.